One of these things is not like the others

An ode to standing out

There’s a house I pass on my way to work that always catches my eye.

It’s got a big patch of tall flowers in the front yard, sharply contrasting the more traditional green lawns.

It’s unusual, bizarre, abnormal, a total freak show in a neighborhood of tidy yards.

Isn’t it amazing? I think so, although I bet some of the neighbors would disagree.

I love driving by and getting an eyeful of blossoms, smack dab in the midst of an ordinary city block.

No doubt the bees and butterflies agree that it’s the best property in the area, a safe haven from toxic herbicides and a delightful place to hang out on a sunny day.

Can you guess where I’m going with this?

We live in a culture that is all about keeping up with the Joneses and pristine yard maintenance at the cost of our unique creative expression and wild, natural beauty.

When you’re on a spiritual path, one that is soul-guided and designed for your own personal development, it often feels like standing out like this. Like being very different, sometimes uncomfortably so, from everyone around you. Like you don’t fit in and the neighborhood association disapproves and sometimes issues hefty fines.

It isn’t always easy to be the misfit. It gets tiring sometimes and lonely too.

But given the choice of being a butterfly garden or a boring old artificially- installed and laboriously- maintained lawn, really, what choice is there?

I think it’s safe to say that the world doesn’t need any more manicured grass.

But we sure could use more flowers for the pollinators and nature lovers.

I was delighted to catch this easy assignment this week and write about something light, unlikely to upset anyone, and absent of any internal challenges.

But… I’ve just been informed that I’m not done yet. There’s a deeper layer. If you don’t already know, my soul is the editor in chief here and I’m doing my best to tackle the jobs I’m assigned.

So, here we go. A layer deeper into the WHY.

Why is it so important to let go of the efforts to blend in with the status quo?

For starters, it uses a huge amount of life-force energy. That’s energy that could be spent healing and creating.

Every time I make a choice to inhibit my wild butterfly garden, I’m veering from my soul purpose. Not only does this detract from my personal evolution, but it denies the world the specific medicine I’m here to administer.

I believe we all have a unique gift, one that only we can share, one that is needed here on this planet at this time. If I’m off fussing over dandelions and mowing grass, I’m neglecting to share my medicine with those who need it.

I’ve given a great deal of thought to the concept of purpose. My current understanding is that it isn’t so much about what I do; rather it’s about who I am. That my medicine is being myself and generously transmitting the frequency inherently mine wherever I go.

The challenge lies in the uncovering of my essence. It’s in there somewhere! But it’s been hidden under layers of protection, disguised by conditioning and coping mechanisms, highjacked by the ego-mind.

My work is unraveling it all. Being radically honest with myself about my true desires, my values, my feelings and sensations. Being willing to let go of all that is not really mine and surrender to the Divine’s plan for me.

And here’s the part that’s emerging for me now: I’m already there. That the person I am today has medicine to share that is perfectly calibrated to what is needed today. This isn’t permission to slack off and stop doing my inner work, assuming I’ve reached some arbitrary finish line and can clock out.

Nope. It’s an invitation to step up and share what I’ve got in this moment rather than waiting to I have it all figured out or have completed the next level of training or have healed the pattern that continues to plague me.

Trusting that my wounds, my strengths, my weaknesses, my hopes and dreams, fears and aversions are all part of the equation. Denying any of it alters the formula, making it less potent.

Each step of my journey is an opportunity (I use that word to indicate my willingness to follow my orders. I can go voluntarily or be dragged along- either way, the track is laid.) to be myself, accept myself, be kind to myself, express myself, SHOW myself to those who are watching. Not in a grandiose “LOOK AT ME” way, but a humble “here I am, just as I am, and that matters” way.

I’m not saying this is easy. It’s not! Who said that healing was easy? A pharmaceutical ad? That’s not healing. That’s suppressing, numbing, avoiding, escaping, distracting. It might seem easier in the moment, but over time it’s a huge energy leak and has zero potential to fulfill purpose.

So if you’re ready, or at least willing to make a stand, know that it’s going to get messy. There will be tears and uncomfortable changes, probably some lost relationships. Everything that is not True will need to go.

I find that the harder the assignment, though, the greater the reward. The contentment, peace, joy, pleasure, and sheer delight that I experience when allowing myself to be a beacon of Truth grows exponentially with every step I take.

The good news is that if I pay attention, I’m guided. It takes courage, compassion, curiosity, and determination to follow the guidance, but at least I know which way to go.

Accessing inner wisdom and receiving soul guidance is something anybody can learn. It will likely require learning to be in the moment, in your body, and in your heart. The mind cannot lead this journey. Embodiment practices, like this guided version I recorded, have been invaluable to me, as has spending time in Nature, in prayer and meditation, and chipping away at energetic blockages with Reiki.

It can all begin with an act as simple as placing a hand on your heart and saying aloud, “I am willing to share my medicine. Bring me the guidance that I need in a clear and easily understood way.” Then put down your phone for five minutes so you can notice what happens when you’re not constantly distracted.

You might have a tada! moment with a crystal clear directive of: go here, do this, call Bob. More likely something will come up that seems to stand in your way. That’s also a tada! moment. What appears to be blocking you is your first assignment. Rather than turning away in frustration, I encourage you to accept it and direct your curiosity, courage, compassion and determination towards alchemizing the obstacle.

Often the spiritual path gets romanticized into something frilly and glossy, but really it’s a lot of showing up and facing our fears and desires. Most of us are well-trained at avoiding exactly this. Today is a great day to start training our capacity to fulfill our purpose. One step at a time.

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