How can you get people to respect Reiki?
Q&A for Reiki practitioners
How do you get people to respect Reiki?
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So… how can you get people to respect Reiki and/or your practice?
There are two commons variations of this question. One is when students are first learning Reiki and finding that their people are simply not interested in receiving a session or even hearing about it. This is frustrating and disappointing.
The second is for professionals who are constantly flummoxed by no-shows and last-minute cancellations by clients who are not valuing their time. This is frustrating, disappointing and a loss of expected income.
I have the same response for both.
You don’t.
Gasp!
I don’t believe it’s possible to make people respect Reiki. Or anything else for that matter.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I don’t think Reiki, or your efforts and time don’t deserve respect; they 100% do.
But you can’t force people to do that.
Instead, you can create an inner attitude of self-respect and set protective boundaries. Only those matching your level of respect should be granted entry. And then, my friend, it’s your job to enforce those boundaries. You probably won’t love doing this, but it needs to be done.
You can weed out those who don’t value Reiki and create more space for magnetizing people who do. You’re the only one who can do this, unless you hire a personal assistant or office manager.
You don’t need to oust friends and family whose eyes glaze over when you bring up energy healing. I recommend continuing to mention it and the amazing results you experience and witness. Over time, this can normalize out-of-the box healing for in-the-box dwellers.
AND you can lower your expectations of those who continuously show zero interest. Share your observations, but don’t anticipate a hearty reception. AND, this is the important part, don’t let your self-value be based on the reactions and opinions of others.
Easier said then done, for sure, but you can use Reiki for this! Perhaps an intention of knowing your own worth and the worth of your work coupled with the hand positions. If you’re a habitual people-pleaser, do-gooder, or Helper, this will require some consistent application. These neural pathways run deep in many of us.
AND if someone is derisive or mocking or just downright mean, well… is that someone you want in your world? Sometimes life gives us opportunities like this to upgrade our surroundings. If something is important to me, I expect those close to me to respect it at the very least. Those in my inner circle must be accepting if not downright curious and supportive. Otherwise, there is no room for them in my space.
Now for those in a professional practice, we need stronger boundaries. When we value our work enough to protect our time from wishy-washy, flakey, inconsiderate, unreliable clientele, we simply must require respect as a pre-requisite for booking appointments.
That can come in a variety of ways, but I find pre-payment invariably weeds out those who aren’t sincere and serious about their requests. A clear cancellation policy in writing with verifiable acknowledgment of acceptance will work wonders. Better yet, a deposit or even full payment in advance ensures compensation.
We might gradually change how others view this counter-culture approach to healthy living and spiritual awakening. But we can absolutely grow greater respect for ourselves and not settle for anything less from those with whom we interact.
You will very likely loss some friends and definitely potential clients when you upgrade your boundaries to protect your new level of self-respect. Ask yourself, do you want to associate with people who are not respectful towards you? Is this the vision you have for your future?
Just this week I accepted a new client over the phone without securing payment. I knew it was a risk, but was willing to take it because I offered a time slot that was convenient to me, that was during a historically low-volume day and time, when I would already be at my office and have plenty of admin work to keep my busy if he didn’t arrive as planned.
I have a suspicion he won’t. And if this is what happens, and he wants to reschedule, I’ll explain the boundary. I only work with people who are committed to showing up (vs. keeping the appointment in their pocket if there’s nothing “better” to do; as if there is anything better than Reiki!), who value my time and expertise, and are willing to take responsibility for the impact their behavior has on others (i.e. forgetting an appointment and wasting my time and interfering with my income). Moving forward, prepayment will be necessary, and the 24-hour cancellation policy enforced.
Does that sound unreasonable? Your boundary might be different, especially if you’re new to the biz or this is a personal acquaintance. It’s good to know what your boundaries are and to practice articulating them. The more comfortable you are, the less defensive you will feel and the less pushback you’re likely to get.
And if someone is unwilling or unable to meet you in this place that you’ve defined as acceptable to you, you can negotiate. Or not. I might give a few chances to people I’ve known for some time or who might be going through a rough patch. But a stranger only gets one chance to flake, and then needs to put his money where his mouth is.
If that sounds harsh, especially for someone in the healing and spiritual arts, consider all the other businesses (and let’s face it, I’m in business to be of service while also earning a living, not courting martyrdom) that get paid up front. Would an airline hold your ticket to Hawaii that you booked on a whim during an insomnia spell without payment? Would Taylor Swift reserve your seat? NOPE.
Adulting can be hard, and there’s a lot of adulting required to run a successful business that doesn’t suck you dry. Stop giving your time away to folks who aren’t serious about your services and watch as the vacuum effect kicks in and fabulous, appreciative, generous, reliable, and respectful people turn up because you upped your vibe. This applies to both the personal and professional worlds.
And it all starts with you recognizing your own worth and the value you provide by just being you and sharing the gift of Reiki.