Annual Review

AKA it’s my birthday!

Welcome! I’m delighted you’ve dropped by. These words flow out from my fingertips, ushered by Spirit, and I always hope they will be of benefit to someone out there. Maybe it’s you! I want to offer A BIG Thank You to my subscribers. Your ongoing engagement is greatly appreciated. I love hearing from everyone, so please do drop a note in the comments.

Photo by Wout Vanacker on Unsplash

It’s my birthday tomorrow! Yup. I’ve logged 53 trips around the sun and am back here at the beginning point. I like to spend some time on these milestones cataloging the past year and sorting through the strategies that I want to keep, those I want to upgrade and those that just need to go.

As I look back over the year, the question is, what metrics do I use to gauge what is working and what is not? I’ve given this a great deal of thought, and the answer that pops to the forefront is: integrity and intentional creativity. Do my outsides match my insides or am I hiding behind a mask? Have I acted in alignment with my priorities, values and whole being? Am I the best version of myself available at this point in time?

And of course, it isn’t exactly as simple as that. Outcomes do factor in somewhat, even though they aren’t the basis of my merit system.

I don’t look to net worth (whew!), tropical vacations, bling I’ve accrued or dinner party invitations. That’s not at all what I’m about.

But if there was a measurement for life-force points, I’d be off the charts! While I still have some mobility issues due to chronic pain, I’ve made great strides (pun intended) over the past six months. I’m not where I hoped to be just yet, but everyday I’m tuned in to what activities (or inactivity) will be most beneficial. I am counting progress as a win, but more importantly, I’m taking full credit for consistent effort.

There’s an element of knowing my priorities and my sphere of influence. This underlies intentional creativity as a sort of foundation. It’s what informs my actions rather than some external model of keeping up with the Joneses.

My priorities are crystal clear to me. My health and well-being rank first. My spiritual practice is both part of that and important enough to have its own category as well. Meaningful relationships come in third, with an element of connecting with my soul and Spirit, blended in with close friendships. Next up is creativity and self-expression, which you are witnessing here (for the 30th consecutive week, I am pleased to add!). My business and work, which is dear to my heart, round out the list.

Very upside down for an American, right? That’s why I’ve developed my own system. I can’t rate my success according to dollars earned when I value non-tangibles more than cash and the stuff it buys.

Now that I know what I’m working towards, it’s essential to run it through a filter of what is actually in my purview. This is where the serenity prayer comes in. Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Unlike many new age teachings, I don’t believe I have complete control over my reality. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a victim here. I have LOADS of power, and lots of it is tied to my thoughts and beliefs. But I’m not omnipotent. So, when I’m working towards a goal and not making any headway, I can trust that it’s not in my best interest, not in the cards for me, or it’s just not the right time. The goal is not getting caught up in the web of attachment or aversion to what is currently unfolding in my life.

I’m still grappling with the paradox of accepting where I am, allowing myself to want what I want and not be attached to either. I’m getting better at being able to hold seeming contradictions, but it’s still a work in progress.

There were many intense challenges this year, along with a growing number of blissful moments. They often went hand in hand, one building on the another.

Focusing on health and well-being has long been a standard in my life, but it’s shifted in the past year to include the mysterious factor of perimenopause. After the previous year of failing to adapt and adopting a “fuck it” approach, I got more mindful and pivoted. Many of my habits have been updated to include hormonal, metabolic and circadian rhythm support for this new phase. I made great improvements by looking at what is in my power to change and taking guided action. It’s definitely an improvement over the previous approach!

This has included honoring my feelings in unprecedented ways. This, as you might imagine, has sometimes been extremely uncomfortable! And often clunky and awkward, but I carry on because it’s important. By taking a stand when a stand is needed, I’m sending a message that my feelings matter, that I matter, and that I’m adamant that boundaries are to be respected.

In practice, this means I needed to share with a friend that the impact of their behavior was hurtful. There’s rarely a good outcome in situations like this, but it was important to me to speak this truth rather than burying the emotions. It didn’t go well. But I did my part, had the courage to address a situation that was UP for me in a big way, and the rest is out of my hands.

This adulting stuff can really be a bummer sometimes! But the surge of power that comes from standing in alignment with myself; body, mind, and spirit, is very rewarding.

There have been other upsets to catalog. I had some disappointing experiences with online dating. I attempted two different collaborative efforts and both fizzled. But I was willing and eager to try something new and did my part as best I could. I wasn’t saint-like when dealing with my mother, but we got through our interactions without any yelling or tears. A number of clients drifted away, and I had several setbacks rehabbing my frozen shoulder.

While these aren’t optimal results, still they’re well within the integrity zone as I haven’t sacrificed my values or feelings in the process.

On the upside, I made a new friend, gained a handful of delightful regular clients who really appreciate my work, remain devoted to this blog and its evolution, joined a new community of women, deepened my connection with the rhythms of nature, have begun a mindful eating habit (meaning, put down the book and savor the meal), logged tons of time in the woods and twice monthly video chats with my niece and nephews, scored a new-to-me rebounder (Freebie Alerts- a fantastic app for finding good free stuff!) when mine started creaking, read oodles of books and blogs, attended Gyrokinesis classes once or twice every week, reinvented my yoga practice after a long hiatus, found a holistic dentist and tended to my teeth, and (re)started making my own bone broth, sauerkraut and cashew milk.

And perhaps most importantly, I have become super-intentional and self-accountable. This comes from a journaling practice that includes setting goals each morning and then following up that evening. Did I do what I said I would? If yes, then let’s acknowledge that as a way to make it more likely to happen again. If no, then why not and how can I improve the likelihood next time? Putting it all in writing has been instrumental to improving my somewhat airy-fairy relationship with intention setting.

All that to say, it’s been both a tough and rewarding year here on planet earth. I’m happy to announce that I’m increasingly healthy, my immune system is in tip-top shape, I usually sleep through the night, and I experience inexplicable joy and peace and love frequently. I bet some billionaires would be jealous of this!

I’m looking forward to the next lap around the sun and am committed to reporting the whacky experiences along the way. I have a clear picture of my goals and sound strategies for moving towards them. I ask myself often, how does it get better than this? and pay attention to the response within.

I’m curious if you have any birthday rituals or unique ways of marking your progress throughout the years. How do you measure your successes? How does it get better than this for you? Inquiring minds want to know!